photo by erin clow of love&camera
Tip #35 is CLEANSE. Are you ready to clear the fences of self-doubt and public opinion? Let’s unsaddle the old patterns of pleasing and appeasing others, and ride wild and free in the verdant pastures of Purusha – unlimited creative possibility.
One of the most difficult things for me to clear from my life is other people’s expectations and opinions of me.
There's no doubt I have a feisty adventure spirit. Over the past 16 years, I’ve jumped fences of corporate jobs and a few cities on my westward bestward trail to California. Choices I courageously made to honor my creative freedom and manifest my life dreams.
However, my “I’m listening to my heart and going to do it my way” is often hijacked by a rabid beast howling “…yet, I need your approval.” The approval being that of a parent, friend, special dude, or in this case, folks who read my writing.
For example, this morning while sitting down to write, I felt completely lost on how to frame the piece. I froze in panic. Pan-ick – the energy that rolls out the welcome mat for resistance. Then anxiety appeared, because I wanted to send y’all the newsletter this morning. Anxiety’s sidekick – confusion, rode up in attempt to divert my focus, which then summoned the winds of bullshit and distraction.
Suddenly my creative energy felt scattered and shattered by a parade of false gods threatening my writer’s heart and artist spirit. On one shoulder danced the doubt devil, tempting me to do a donut run. On the other shoulder, my creative muse gently beckoned me to take the helm at my writer’s desk.
By the grace of God, I sat. And wonder appeared right outside my writing desk window. In my front garden, attached to a fence is a metal sign with the word “Wonder”. Beyond and beyond is an open field, called More Mesa, which adjoins the endless Pacific Ocean. The significance of such topography was not lost on me. More countryside and infinite seas were in my immediate view.
In regards to writing this post, I realized I was sitting on the edge of unlimited possibility. Suddenly my perception shifted. I felt courage and curiosity rise within me. I jumped the fences of fear and expectations.
Untethered from deadlines, doubts, and other’s opinions on my writing, I felt free. Instead of falling apart, I fell in love with the great unknown that borders every artist’s journal page, painting canvas, or camera lens. And I roamed and wrote. I revised and wrote. I kept writing across the open fields of Purusha.
Free of the fear hovels and opinion grovels, I summoned the courage to ride my words like a wild mustang all over my computer screen. I enjoyed every moment of this post’s adventure.
So, fellow adventurers, clear a fear or expectation fence today. Do one thing today that makes you feel wild and free. And remember, never abandon your dreams for another’s agenda, or sacrifice your peace in order to pacify another.
p.s. A few words on the cover photo. My writing this morning was also triggered by a road trip with my dear friend and ah-mazing photographer, Erin Clow. We recently visited a dog and horse rescue ranch in Lompoc. Erin captured the wild beauty and glorious free sprit of the wild mustangs. It was the memory of watching these magnificent creatures that realigned me with my inner child and wild writer.
One more thing I recalled this morning. As a kid, I named my play horse, “Wonder”. My Mom once told me that when asked where I was going, I replied, “Far away”. As in no fences of fear or expectations. Only fields of imagination, curiosity, and magic.
Today’s Self-Care Adventure: First, unsaddle yourself from others’ opinions. Write down 1-3 things that someone else has put on your “to do” list. Now burn the list. Then do breath awareness mediation. 11 breaths. Inhale: Affirm your personal freedom and serenity. Exhale: Jump the fence of expectations and visualize open fields of possibility. Ride wild and free towards the horizon of your heart’s dreams. Holler “Giddy up & Yeehaw!” (Trust me, this really works).